After weeks of shopping, wrapping, preparation, and anticipation, Christmas is finally here. Jen and I are spending time with each of our families and enjoying much-needed R&R around beautiful Christmas trees and festively decorated dinner tables. Here is a peek at our holiday surroundings.
TV is a big part of my life and always has been. Now this isn’t something one should ever really admit to—you know, being “lowbrow” and all—but growing up an only child, my weeknights would normally consist of me in front of the set watching anything and everything. I loved being able to grow up with certain characters and pretend like they were my friends in real life (I’m still mad at Kelly for what she did to Brenda). But really, I’d get so invested in their fictional lives. And I still do. Lots of life lessons I’ve learned vicariously through watching a ridiculous amount of television; in honor of that, I had to make this list of Christmas gifts each of my favorite, inspirational single girl characters deserve.
A few weeks ago we posed the question, have you ever heard of or read The Rules? The Rules: Time-tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right was published in 1995 by Ellen Fein and Sherries Schneider, a dynamic duo with the guise that they had this whole dating thing figured out. The golden rule upon which their dating bible was built is the simple premise that men must be the aggressors in a relationship. The Rules is essentially a 35-point action plan to carry this out. Fast forward almost 20 years and The Rules may feel a bit archaic.
With guidelines such as “Don’t Talk to a Man First” and “Don’t Talk Too Much,” The Rules seems a far cry from the Lean In culture today’s Single Girl has embraced. With good cause, women are being prompted more than ever to be more aggressive in claiming ownership over the course of their lives. Want to be CEO of a big company one day? Fight your way to the top! Want to marry the man of your dreams? Buy the ring and ask him yourself! The message is coming across loud and clear: “the rules” are changing.
With all of that said, The Rules continues to survive even in a Sheryl Sandberg world. In addition to having been a best-selling book at the time of release, the authors spawn new versions of The Rules every few years and continue to find themselves attracting publicity. This had me wondering, is there something about The Rules that defies the test of time? As crazy as they might initially seem, do they actually work?’
Having read the book myself, my short answer to the question is “Yes, I believe in The Rules.” BUT (of course there’s a but), I also believe they only work so much as today’s Single Girl is able to pass them through the filter of the present realities. The key is to be smart about The Rules and to reapply them in a way that makes sense. To give you a better sense of what I mean, I’ve taken 15 of The Rules suggestions and decoded them into a set of practical guidelines that I believe actually make sense for our Tinder, Twitter, Insta, Chatting worlds. Read on for The Single Diaries take on The Rules.
The holidays are in full swing, which means food and parties are everywhere. While this is a period of fun and quality time with loved ones, it can also be quite stressful running from one event to another or even just one store to another! Additionally, you may find yourself without enough hours in the day for self-care, exercise, or even just sleep. All of this can lead to unwanted weight gain (an additional obstacle to your New Year’s resolution to get in shape). Here are ten ways to avoid gaining the dreaded “holiday 10.”
(more…)
Years ago when I heard Fergie’s “Clumsy,” part of the song caught my attention and made me immediately think of myself:
You know this ain’t the first time this has happened to me
This love sick thing.
I like serious relationships, and uh
A girl like me don’t stay single for long.
‘Cause every time a boyfriend and I break up
My world is crushed and I’m all alone…
The love bug crawls right back up and bites me, and I’m back.
It has been ten years since I was last single: I was a 16-year-old at La Cueva High School, lonely after my move from the Bay Area to New Mexico. After that failed “high school sweetheart” relationship, the others fell in line one after the other with titles out of Carrie Bradshaw’s black book: “baby daddy,” “the Guatemalan,” and most recently, the “40-year-old.” All great relationships, all ending in heartbreak and tears.