In eighteen months, we left jobs, enjoyed funemployment, explored our cities, dated, traveled, moved, discovered more about ourselves, and learned hundreds of lessons. Every week on The Single Diaries, we shared personal experiences and life lessons we found along the way after college. As we prepare to start a new chapter, read on for the ones we learned from devoting a year and a half to The Single Diaries.
A year ago, I wrote about the benefits of investing in yourself as a single girl. A year later, I’m still single! We talk about being superbly single, but we’ve stressed the status to include all independent women. Today I want to delve deeper in actually being single, unattached, not in a relationship. As I’ve mentioned before, I have never had a serious boyfriend. So if you’re looking for an expert at being single, I am that.
When I share my status out loud, or I make a joke like “How is this girl still single?” or “Wouldn’t it be funny if I’m the next cousin to get married?” even if I’m the only cousin who isn’t dating anyone, it may seem like self-deprecation to save face before someone reminds me that I’ll “meet the right person when it’s time”… but truly I’m proud of my eternal singlehood. Of course, like anyone else, I have my moments of freaking out about turning 40 and not being married. But for the most part, I’m happy with the choices I’ve made for myself.
I’ve reflected on and written about many revelations I encountered the past year in regard to living in the moment and finding the message in every obstacle. Starting The Single Diaries has pushed me to live superbly single, consciously and unconsciously. It’s been a year of growth: I recognized unhappiness in my life and came face to face with it. I spent time trying to remedy discontentment with more side projects, more social outings, more play when what I really needed was complete quiet.
Among those remedies to try to increase the fun and counter the stress was online dating in the form of fun and easy apps. What I learned from my short stint of serial dating was what we all know but don’t acknowledge: For those of us who desire monogamy and marriage, dating is a way to audition or interview to find the “right” partner. It’s also a way for us to understand what we want and merely who we are as individuals.
Sure, there are lessons I have yet to learn from being in a committed relationship, but I think there are just as many in learning how to be alone. Here are the ones that have been most important to my personal growth.
When we founded The Single Diaries a year ago, we had no idea we wouldn’t be in the same city so soon. (Don’t tell me I’ve never been in a long-distance relationship.) Separation anxiety aside, we are finding one major plus to working out of two different major cities: more wine bars to frequent, more neighborhoods to explore, more dishes to discover! In honor of our new status as a bi-city blog, we bring you our favorite mainstays from San Francisco and Los Angeles.
As we commit to year 2, we unveil our manifesto… the words we live by, the summary of our work, the mission we strive to carry out post by post. Twelve months flew by, so we simply want to say Thank You. Thank you for reading, for supporting our stories, and for inspiring us to leap. Every. Single. Day.
We have big plans for our second year and can’t wait to share them with you as they unfold. Until then, read on for a look back at our favorite moments from the first year of living our mission, and share your favorites with us too.
If you haven’t heard the news, I’m in transition moving from L.A. back to my hometown in the San Francisco Bay Area. In an ode to my home of nine years (I spent the first four in college), I wanted to share my City of Angels. Los Angeles is made up of over 80 neighborhoods, and mine is part of the beautiful Westside. One of the best things about this major U.S. city is its diversity and space for everyone to create their own version of the city. You can be a struggling actor (literally) or a multi-millionaire and find activities, food, and people that appeal to you; granted, it takes some work. I love that Los Angeles is something different to every single person that lives there. I love how much flack it gets from people who don’t truly understand the hidden nuances. I love how you can drive to a different neighborhood and feel like you’re somewhere new entirely. You never run out of places to explore. Each of those 80 neighborhoods has its own character, and I’m so excited to share some of the best things about the Westside.